Endless Tears, Forgotten Guilt
by CandySox
Summary: Drugs and Abuse, they never seem to hurt just one person, do they? With help from Victoria Poe, Lots of help, See how the night grows long, and pain never ends.
1. Only Women Bleed

_**Candysox**_

If you read this, Please, I'm begging you, don't do drugs, don't abuse those you love, and don't do anything listed in this Fic.

The song is _Only Women Bleed _By Alice Cooper

_Man's got his woman to take his seed  
He's got the power - oh  
She's got the need  
She spends her life through pleasing up her man  
She feeds him dinner or anything she can_

Courtney waited alone in her bed for Duncan, the only thing they did anymore that even resembled love. He was out again, "Duncan," She whispered through tears. "Duncan, why did you do this to me?" She pulled her knees to her chest and held up her hands, examining them in the moonlight. The scars ran thick down them and all along her body. "Why?" She gushed tears, silver in the moonlight, and thought of their life together. They got married at the age of 18 because Courtney had been gifted with her and Duncan's child, back when she still loved him.

_She cries alone at night too often  
He smokes and drinks and don't come home at all  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed_

The baby was to be a girl, they planned to name her Amber. He had worked hard to bring in money for the two of them, his parents offered their basement. The late hours that Duncan worked led him to drink, go out to bars, and not come home at night. The months passed and his drinking only got worse. Then, that night, July1st, 8 months into the pregnancy, he hit her for the first first time. He hit her hard, against a wall and the child was lost. No one ever found out, and in the morning, Duncan remembered not a thing. _  
_  
_Man makes your hair gray  
He's your life's mistake  
All you're really lookin' for is an even break_

Courtney looked at the clock, 11:05. He was late home again. She jumped out of bed and slipped into a robe, then walked to the mirror. She looked at the scars adn her scraggly, uneven hair. "Why! Why did you do this to me? God, please help us." She grabbed handfuls of hair and let the tears fall freely. The door opened, and the man walked through. Duncan walked up to her and kissed along her neck, the smell of vodka and women was over-powering._  
_  
_He lies right at you  
You know you hate this game  
He slaps you once in a while and you live and love in pain_

"Where have you been, Sweetheart?" Courtney asked in a timid voice. "What do you mean, Princess? I was at work." He continued to kiss her, along her jaw now. "Duncan, your shift ended two hours ago." He stopped abruptly, and looked up. "No it didn't, it just ended." She shook her head, and opened her mouth to speak. He stopped her. "**IT JUST ENDED, BITCH!**" He slapped he harshly across the face and she sobbed harder as a mark started to form. He softened his features and led her to their bed.

_She cries alone at night too often  
He smokes and drinks and don't come home at all  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed_

Courtney woke up next morning and looked over to se Duncan still sound asleep, she grabbed her robe and stood up, wincing from the pain she felt all over. New bruises covered her body. She walked awkwardly to the bathroom and shut the door soundlessly. The lock clicked into place, and she looked to the counter, there was a pen, paper, and her makeup bag. She grabbed the pen and wrote her final words. She finished the final word with trembling hands and opened the small bag, inside was a razor._  
_  
_Black eyes all of the time  
Don't spend a dime  
Clean up this grime  
And you there down on your knees begging me please come  
Watch me bleed_

She unlocked the door and left it open, Duncan was awake. "Princess, are you awake?" She let out a choked sigh and pulled his attention to the item in her hands. "Duncan, watch me. This is what you did to me. Do me one favor, find a woman who loves you, and stop drinking." She laughed softly and pulled the thin sheet of metal over the veins in her wrist. Duncan took her in his arms and held her close as she whispered to him: _"I love you, Duncan. But I can't take it anymore. You can do better" _She let out a weak laugh as his tears and her blood mixed. Her breaths grew short and the laughter died, the beautiful woman was no more._  
_  
_Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
Only women bleed  
_


	2. Hello

_Candysox_

This story (Not including the characters) belongs to 5560 productions, BoxLox Inc. and W.O.P. (World Of Posers) United.

The song is Hello, by Evanescence

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**WARNING:**This story might be a bit hard to follow. And the ending is cheesy.

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_**Playground school bell rings again.  
Rain clouds come to play again.**_

_A little girl swings back and forth on a swing set, her father pushing her. "Higher, daddy, higher!" She giggled with a cheery smile on her face. Trent obliged and gave her one big push, making the girl scream with happiness. The man smiled, and his wife sat on the ground next to them drawing._

_"I love you momma!" The girl shouted. "daddy, tell momma you love her."_

_"I love you, Gwen!" Gwen looked up and smiled, a drop of rain hit her nose. The girl jumped down from the swings and into a slowly growing puddle of mud. She stamped and giggled at the mud soaked her jeans and seeped into her shoes. She ran over to her father and gave him a playful shove. "Tag you're 'it', daddy!"_

_**Has no one told you she's not breathing?  
Hello, I'm your mind giving you  
Someone to talk to.  
Hello.**_

Gwen walked to her daughter's old room, remembering how she used to play dolls with her, and tell silly stories. It was the same as it had been before the incident, even the little guitar laying on the bed next to her barbie. She sighed and walked across the room to the bed. Even the little empty glass of water still sat on her bedside table, the words "Amy my angel" painted on the side.

_"Mommy, you be the queen, and I'll be the magical princess!" Amy giggled with delight as her mother handed her a barbie with jet black hair and brown eyes._

Gwen sat on the bed and thoughtfully held the doll over her heart.

_**If I smile, and don't believe  
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream**_

A knocking came from downstairs. She gave one last glance to the doll and set it on the bed before walking to the door. "Hey, Gwen, How've you been?" Bridgette was on the other side of the door. She walked in a gave Gwen a slight hug before sitting down on the couch just a few feet away.  
"I'm ok. Glad to see you." She half-heartedly answered. Bridgette gave her a caring look.

_**Don't try to fix me, I'm not broken.  
Hello, I'm the lie living for you so you can hide.  
Don't cry.**_

_**  
**_"We need to talk." Bridgette scooted closer to the pale girl and uncomfortably stared at her hands. "You need help."

"With what?"

"Depression. I know that the fire was hard on you, loosing Trent and Amy, but you've got to move on with your life."

Gwen stood up and glared at her. "NO! I don't need help, I'm not depressed, get out!" She pointed towards the door and as Bridgette opened her mouth to add something shouted. "**NO! **I'm doing fine, GET OUT!" The blonde looked at her friend sadly and walked to the door, looking back only once.

_**  
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping  
Hello, I'm still here.  
All that's left of yesterday.**_

Gwen threw open the doors of her liqueur cubbard in the kitchen, grabbing the first bottel that her hand found, and grabbed her pills. Anti-depressants. She opened the bottle and chugged half of it. "I'm fine. You hear me?! I'm fine!" She uncapped the pill case and threw a handful in her mouth. "I'm FINE!"

A few days later

"Gwen?" Bridgette pushed open the unlocked front door and noticed the smell, something thick clung to the air, deadly and alcoholic. "Gwen are you here?" She padded thought the door and up the stairs, following the door was still open, Amy's old bedroom. She walked in and screamed. Gwen was laying on the floor dead, parasites clung to her skin, not hatching yet, and regurgitated pills and vodka surrounded her face, mostly filled with flys and larvae.

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"Mommy, I missed you." Amy walked towards her mother, over the clouds with her black curls waving in the warm wind.

"I missed you too, Baby." Gwen held her little girl close and felt the featherlight touch of her lover wrapping his arms around her. "I missed you both, we'll never be apart again though."

They hugged and stood there, on the stairway to heaven.


	3. Polly

_Candysox and Victoria Poe_

Hello all, before you read, I have a confession to make... I did not write this songfic for _**Polly**_, it was my good friend, Victoria Poe, so enjoy and give the credit to her. The only reason the story was written and posted here? She wanted to be a part of this collection, she also feels deeply for making a difference in the world.

**Disclamer:**

**This is NOT written by Candysox.**

**This story (Not including the characters) belongs to 5560 productions, BoxLox Inc. and W.O.P. (World Of Posers) United.**

**Inspired by a true event.**

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_**Text message**_

_Thoughts or stressed word_

Product

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Courtney picked up her phone and noticed that she had a text message from Duncan, she rolled her eyes, _so protective_. She flipped the sleek black LG open and read: _Cort __**did u lik the show? 1st concert w/out me.**_She quickly texted him back and leaned against her car, letting herself be chilled by the cold car door. _**I'm fine, Duncan. Why are you being so protective? It's not like I'm going to take a snort of coke or crack just because I'm at a punk-rock concert. lol.**_

She let her finger freeze over the tiny send and looked around. _I could have swore that I saw something over by that car. _She suddenly felt very... _open_. Courtney wrapped her flimsy green windbreaker tighter around her form and looked around once more. She still saw nothing in the parking lot.

Her phone vibrated angrily in her hands, ringing to the tune of Alice Cooper's 'Poison'. She hesitantly answered the call. "Princess, are you okay?"

"Yea, Why are you being so protective of me?"

She heard him sigh and could almost picture him chewing the inside of his cheek to keep from telling her something unpleasant. "Courtney, just get home quick, okay? There's a guy that escaped from prison, I guy I knew in juvie. Trust me, I don't want you to meet him." He paused and Courtney held her breath, worriedly glancing to the car that she had seen movement near.

"Okay, Duncan, I'll be home soon. I Lo-" She cluched her stomach and shrank to the ground. A man hovered over her.

"Princess? Courtney? COURTNEY?" Duncan called from the phone. The man picked up her cell phone and spoke with a voice like velvet.

"Hello, old friend." He cackled and kicked Courtney as she tried to inch away. "Did you miss me?" The man flipped the phone shut before Duncan could answer. "Now now, sweetheart, don't be like that. I just want one little thing from you, and I'll be done." He roughly grabbed her by the hair and pulled Courtney away to a van, then threw her in roughly. She was thrown in the back, where there were no seats. He turned on the radio and picked out a song wile Courtney struggled to find a way out.

_**Polly wants a cracker.  
Think I should get  
off her first.  
I think she wants some water.  
To put out the blow torch. **_

He flashed a smile with his yellowed teeth, and pushed her down on the floor of his van and ripped her hairbands out. "Lovely." The man commented as he wrapped the brightly colored bands around Courtney's wrists. He leaned over her and pushed her windbreaker away. One hand tauntingly slid down to her jeans and fiddled with the zipper, the other reached in his back pocket and drew forth a pocketknife. Courtney gasped as she felt the knife cut away her shirt and bra.

"NO, no stop, please!" She begged, but he simply let his face skim over her breasts. His hands unfastened her pants and slipped them off. He pressed her down with one knee and begain to do the same to his own pants._**  
It isn't me.  
We have some seed.  
Let me clip.  
Your dirty wings.  
Let me take ride.  
Don't cut yourself.  
I want some help.  
To help myself.  
I've got some rope.  
You have been told.  
I promise you.  
I have been true.  
Let me take a ride.  
Don't hurt yourself.  
I want some help.  
To help myself.  
**_

He sang the words and slid his pants off slowly. Courtney screamed and was answered with a harsh slap, she only sobbed. "Shut UP!" He spat in her face and slipped out of the rest of his clothes. His hand coiled around her neck like a snake, and his legs were planted between her own now. He took his pocketknife and let it slide along her legs, enjoying the sight of the red wetness seeping out in small slivers. He barley heard her screams, he was in another world, another sadistic world. "Stop! No it hurts NO! Let go of me!"

_**Polly wants a cracker.  
Maybe she would like more food.  
She asks me to untie her.  
A chase would be  
nice for a few. **_

He watched, intrigued by her screams. She kicked, wondering how no one could hear them. His eyes glassed over and he moved her legs slightly. At first, Courtney thought he was going to let her go, then he touched her. He let his grimy fingers slither where they should not, she screamed and felt pain unlike any other. His fingers were painfull stinging against her dry pussy, and the grime from the car floor burned in her open cuts.

_**Polly says her back hurts.  
And she's just as bored as me.  
She caught me off my guard.  
It amazes me, the  
will of instinct.**_

_**  
**_She screeched as he removed his fingers and added another cut to her leg. "Every time you scream, I'll cut you somewhere different." She nodded as tears spilled over the confines of her eyelids. She then thought, _Maybe I will die, that would be nice. I wonder though, are my tears blue with sadness, or clear? _She hyperventilated and tried to remain quiet as the man leered at her body, nothing mattered anymore.

_**It isn't me.  
We have some seed.  
Let me clip.  
Your dirty wings.  
Let me take ride.  
Don't cut yourself.  
I want some help.  
To help myself.  
I've got some rope.  
You have been told.  
I promise you.  
I have been true.  
Let me take a ride.  
Don't hurt yourself.  
I want some help.  
To help myself.  
**_

In the distance, she heard police sirens, he glared at her, daring her to scream and shout. She looked at the knife, and back at his face, he wasn't looking at her though. Her eyes widened. "Oh god NO! SOMEONE HELP ME! I'M BEING RAPED!" She screamed as he plunged into her, she felt ready to split open. There was no attraction, thus she was dry, and he was using all his force just to get inside.

"You stupid Bitch!" He pushed forward with all his strength and she felt her virgin barrier give. Tears ran down her face and clung to her skin like oil, and someone began to bang on the car door.

"Courtney, are you in there?" She knew that voice, Duncan _had _come for her!

"Yes, help me!" The man slapped her and picked up the knife once more. He ran it down between her breasts in one long, deep line. She screamed bloody murder, one way or another, it would all be over soon. He pulled out of her and took the knife to her side, leaving yet another cut, and he flipped her over to make more on her back, in the shape of a heart.

Someone outside shot at the door multiple times, and another tugged at it ia an attempt to get inside. "Get the fuck outta my WAY!" Screamed Duncan. Courtney could not see for her face was against the rough carpet of the van floor, but she heard glass breaking and hoped that is was him coming to save hard hit her head and the last thing her heard was someone punching another person.

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One month Later

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"Miss Evans" Called a nurse in a clean white uniform. Courtney was lying in bed at a hospital with Duncan by her side. "Miss, I'm afraid we have some bad news," The nurse's smile turned to a from so quickly it looked false. "Miss, you may be pregnant." The CIT fainted.

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**A** **note from author, Victoria Poe: You may think that this story is accually the one that the song "Polly" was written about, but it is actually the story of my birth, with a few minor changes. I would rather not get into details, but that is why it was written, and today is my birthday.**_**  
**_


End file.
